This past week/ weekend I identified another place in my life I needed to find surrender.
My finances.
Money is a hot topic for many many people and, well, I’m no exception.
The message came to me “trust money”
It seemed like an awfully weird concept but I understood clearly.
Let go of the outcome, stop controlling, stop worrying, stop allowing others fears to control how I believed it would show up (or not).
Just let go.
The same way I’ve been surrendering to all of my other life situations.
Yes I want a change in the situation. But change doesn’t come through forcing it.
And even if we achieve change in our lives through force and willpower we’ll need to maintain that amount of force to keep the change in place because we are working against nature.
So surrendering and trusting the universe is the way to create change with ease and grace. Believe, achieve, receive.
So here I go… I was on a mission to trust money. To let go of my fears and doubts.
This shouldn’t be hard- it’s a practice I’ve been strengthening since Dec.
I’m not sure who I was fooling lol.
It was hard. The more I tried to surrender the louder my fears got.
My meditations became anxiety ridden and not peaceful at all.
I tried not to give any power to these fears and over ride them with deep breathing, trying to find my relaxation through it all.
And then I had another thought…
I was trying to find “surrender and acceptance” of the situation and my belief systems. But I wasn’t actually surrendering to my fears- I was trying to control them- so I surrendered to the non-surrendering.
I let it be ok to get anxious, to be upset, to be worried, I gave space to my fears.
And the damndest thing happened. I no longer had anything to worry about.
Softly, but surely, my fears shifted and each day now I catch myself in a situation to two where previously I would have been tense and insecure- but now I find a peace and inspiration to continue in ways I’ve never considered in the past.
I whole heartedly believe in divine timing, and looking at the situations that are right in front of you. So each day I tackle the next question of awareness.
What is the universe presenting to me today? Somedays it’s beautiful and miracles just unravel themselves.
Other days it’s messy and awkward but slowly each day we continue to step into a life that is more and more aligned with our connection to the divine.
I couldn’t imagine a better place to be ?